oh hey.

The LLP shop is still closed for the time being. I've decided to make some changes and take some leaps. The shop will reopen next week at my old Etsy location since they now offer instant downloads on digital items. There will also be some new digital prints added as well!

My blog will be moving too (fingers crossed). This is something I've put off for awhile now but really needs to be done. So I may be in and out here.

Lastly, I will not be offering a paper pack for the holidays this year. Sadface, I know. But after returning form my trip to Portland and getting inspired not only creatively but business wise, I've decided to change a lot in this area. In addition, I've had some new opportunities come up that are both exciting and a little scary but it's a leap for sure and I'm ready for the change.

TGIF, happy weekend and all that jazz!

let it snow

We're digging ourselves out of a weekend of non-stop snowfall. It was really quite pretty and I can't complain about it one bit. We are guaranteed a white Christmas, that's for sure.

Weekend highlights -the snow, naturally -spontaneous family portraits via iPhone propped up on chair, in the snow. Our dog is not photogenic like our past pups so it was insanely hard to get her in the shot. Mostly just her tail as she flew by us. Nice. -spontaneous sleepover with my niece. I had planned on getting some scrapping done but that all went south when she stepped in the door. Her parents were planning a surprise bedroom makeover for her and I was happy to oblige by keeping her for the weekend. Her and Tyler are two peas in a pod and I love seeing them play together. Even though she's 7 now, and I can see those "getting older" changes, she still knows how to get silly with a 3 year old. Love that.

Hope your weekend was filled with lovely, spontaneous things. Let's go Monday! (trying hard to be cheerful about that) xot

autumn13

I'm sitting outside on one of the most beautiful fall days, taking in deep breaths of the cold autumn air. I watch Tyler run in his little boots...back + forth across the fallen leaves. Our dog is sitting against my legs as I pat her side and rub her ears. My husband is standing in the doorway, smiling at me from across the yard where I'm sitting, wrapped in my favorite grey sweater under the birch tree. I'm reminded of this quote, "I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, 'If this isn't nice, I don't know what is.'" -  Kurt Vonnegut 

This...this is nice. xot

 

Hello there.

It's been a long while but that's not unusual for the LLP blog. I serisouly have no clue what to do here anymore. I use to talk about my everyday office antics but now it's all toddler fits + Instagram.

So, I'll do just that. Begin. (in bullet points)

  • Screenprinting will be picking up (hopefully) this month. I've got several designs I'm super stoked about. I'm switching things up again for LLP and clearing out all stamps I have in stock. They will not be restocked the remainder of the year. Sale will start this Friday.
  • I have a new gig. I'm now a member of the Basic Grey team and I'm very stoked about that. I've been a long time fan of BG  and I'm anxious to get start in some projects.
  • I had the pleasure of chatting virtually with Catherine Davis and Kinsey WIlson for the Big Picture Class, Process.  (I hope I didn't sound too much like an awkward dork.) "The beauty is in the process" I love that. You can read more aobut the class here.

 

 

  • I was given the chance to be apart of Project Life 365 this week. The prompts given are well thought of and were actually quite challenging. It was inspiring to have these prompts in the back of my mind while I was doing the usual "remember this day" photo quest. Thanks PL365.
And I'm now going to indulge in quiet time with the October issue of Martha Stewart Living. That's what I call a good Monday night. xot.

 

toddler tuesday//follow up on the "haircut"

I gained a lot of knowledge over the next several days following my last post about Tyler's behavior. The overall consensus was to be consistent which makes complete sense. We're already consistent with his schedule which he thrives off of. We've followed the same bedtime routine since he was about 3 months and with the exception of a few days here and there, he's always slept well through the night. We stayed consistent with reading books and working on our words which has helped his speech tremendously. It only makes sense to follow suit when it comes to disciplining.

I think Vanessa said it best with her comment....

"Here’s my advice : whatever you say you will do as a consequence, YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW THROUGH. If you don’t take away the bubble gun after you said you would, you’re a goner!"

Jeff and I knew this from watching Super Nanny and were oblivious to the fact that we were not actually following through on this gem of kiddo advice. We just wanted to resolve the issue without a tantrum which meant just giving in. And so the toddler monster was created. Luckily we weren't in too deep. After a few days of being consistent, I've seen a big improvement. The crying after a certain item is taken away doesn't last long and it's done afterwards.

I also wanted to touch on the subject of disciplining myself as a parent to a toddler.

I will be the first to admit that I value the control I have/had in my life A LOT. It's an issue but I've learned that I cannot control Tyler. That's not how parenting works. He's a whole separate being with a mind and heart of his own. I have to let him be a kid and except that he's learning EVERYTHING. He's 2 1/2, not 30. He's doesn't know unless we teach him. We have to learn to pick out battles with him as well. I want to be consistent with disciplining but I also don't want to be overbearing with constant "No's!". He's not a bad of a kid and I need to give him more credit.

Hoping this helps a little for those who are new to parenting a toddler. Positive feedback helps a lot and knowing that we're not going out of my minds. I also wonder WWSD as in what would Stephanie do as I see her as supermom having double the trouble with her cutie tots, Lucy and Cate not to mention her 2 other girls. And here I am complaining about 1 crazy lovable cub. Sigh.

xot.

 

Tyler's new attitude aka the haircut.

Tyler's hair has been a bit of a hassle as of late. I had taken it apon myself to trim it up a few times throughout the year. I liked having it longer....I thought it differed him from the other little boys plus he simply looked cute. But with the many times I cut it, it started to look shabby. My intention was to find a place to have it trimmed but it never panned out. Well, it's gone now.

Jeff decided to  put the clippers to his head on an unusually hot day here in Alaska. I cannot believe how sad I was too see his pretty tendrils fall to the ground. I hated it at first, still not really use to it. Doesn't look like my sweet little Tyler anymore. I dramatically told Jeff that he cut away his innocence.

He looks at least a year older now and I swear his mentality has changed since that last little bit of hair fell to the ground. Laugh all you want but his inner, inner wild child has emerged. I seem to be dealing with a lot more "no's" and yelling and the glares, oh the glares. What the hell?? This isn't my child I think to myself.

I know this is (for the most part) normal toddler behavior. Please tell me this is normal toddler behavior??

Jeff and I share an inside joke about this whole situation which I think is important when raising a toddler. You've got to be able to see the humor in these things because if you don't, it'll make drive you mental. We now blame all Tyler's mishaps on "the haircut".

Example:

Tyler after repeatedly telling him to not use his bubble gun in the house, is making a mess on the floor. I calmly get down to his level and sternly say that if he pulls that trigger one more time, I'm taking it away. Tyler looks me right in my eye and slowly pulls the trigger to the bubble gun.

WHAT IS THAT???  The haircut.

In his defense, this happens more in the evening during his melt down time. You toddler parents are probably like "oh, that's the reason".

Still. These changes that seem to happen with a blink of an eye are sometimes daunting. I just hope we're handling it as best we can. We still laugh and play more than anything so that's a good thing. But I've got to get a time out system in place. I'd love to hear your tips on disciplining a toddler.

xot

mom's day recap

I'm not one that likes to be fussed over but it was a welcoming feeling this weekend. Jeff surprised me with a cake from one of my favorite local bakeries, the Flying Dutchman. They're old school and that sometimes is a good thing, especially when they produce super moist flavorful cakes. They don't dabble in trends such as cake pops. It's just good old fashioned baked goods. Love that.

I think the best gift was waking up before my son and spending a little time reading and enjoying a cup of coffee. No tv, just the sound of birds singing their morning song. Seems simple but this rarely happens. Tyler gets up early these days and brings it full tilt until bedtime.

I used this time to catch up on a few books I recently downloaded, Steal Like an Artist and The $100 Start up. I finished Steal and loved it. It was more than I expected it to be. Good read for what I'm feeling right now.

I also reflected a little on how good I felt this mother's day. Past holidays were a little tough since there was that void. But since reuniting with my mom last month, things have been really good and positive. I was going to leave this part for my Portland post but since it's post Mother's day, I'll write a little about it now.

I was a little nervous but it didn't overwhelm me. It helped to hang out and have a little fun with Jamaica beforehand and that's why I had planned my trip that way....to have some time to myself before taking the huge step of seeing my mom. And I know I've repeated myself many times but 22 YEARS!! (ever see the movie Gross Point Blank? when Jeremy Piven's character yells, 10 YEARS!! to John Cusack's character...that is what I'm quoting when I say 22 YEARS)

Yep, 22 years. I know. We've been talking on the phone for the past 3 years though...sort of rekindling our relationship. It never felt like a mother/daughter relationship though. More like I was talking to an aunt or a friend. And anytime she would try to act motherly, I would dismiss it. Hell, she was gone when I needed her most and I'm going to take her advice and lectures now?

After Tyler came along, he soften my hard edges tremendously (+ maybe it's me getting older too). My heart was bitter and wary. I held on to negative crap just to be angry which is just stupid and a waste of life. Tyler made me see the world and myself differently. I don't know if he'll ever know what he's done for me....what he continues to do for me.

Back to the renuion. So the day came and I had requested no tears beforehand. She obliged but I could tell she wanted too. We hugged like a mother and daughter in the middle of the Ace Hotel lobby. And later we talked. We shared things we couldn't over the phone. I understand a great deal now. Things that I would have never understood as a kid. I'm not saying it's ok as mother to leave your young children but now I know it wasn't easy for her or that it wasn't our fault. The 2 things that always angered + hurt me.

We spent our day together in good spirits. I can't tell you how good it felt to go do something as normal as shopping sales and eating lunch together. These things that people take for granted everyday. I never up until now had experienced this. Kind of mind blowing.

The day went by fast. She kept saying it was like a dream, having her daughter in her home. She and her husband watched me as I went through the security gates at the airport and waved goodbye until I could no longer see them.

We've talked almost everyday since then. She's my mother now. Maybe she wasn't then or maybe she always was but she's here now and I fully accept that. I plan to visit again in the Fall and hopefully soon she can meet Jeff and Tyler. That's the next big step, one I'm excited for.

I hope all  of  you moms, aunts, grandmothers and sisters had a wonderful mother's day! xot

 

Here

Not exactly sure where to start. So much has happened in the month I've  been absent from my blog. A lot of good, some bad, some just....meh. I have several drafted posts that were never published. I had a really hard time expressing myself publicly through writing. I also question the entegrity of blogging these days. But I'm not going to start in on that subject. I really need to get over it and continue to do what I do here.

I was in a serious funk. Dealing with several issues within my family, having my papa pass away, unsure of who I am in the social media network and what I want out of Life.Love.Paper.

I have been busy designing and working. That's the good. You can find the majority of my work throughout Studio Calico. From stamps to papers to PL cards and photo styling. It's fun and I can't complain.

My own brand is lacking though and that makes me feel like shit. Especially when I see so many others do so well in this market. But I know it takes a lot of dedication and hard work. I have a hard time consistently feeding social media outlets with ads of "what's new" and "what's to come" and I feel as though that maybe my demise?

I know I've gone in a direction that doesn't suit me. I'm focusing too much on keeping up with the Joneses rather than doing what I LOVE MOST and that has made me really unhappy. It puts me in neutral when I'm comparing myself to these successful makers. But then it also fuels me. Inspiration is a great thing. Pinterest, blogs, etc.....it's all good but it can really overwhelm you. I think I got sort of scatter brained and started working on things that made no sense to Life.Love.Paper. I wasted my time trying to come up with the biggest and best and new and that's just silly. I lost my focus of keeping things simple and producing items that I love.

I feel renewed having just returned from a Portland. Man, what an inspiring city. Closing the browser and seeking inspiration in beautiful surroundings.Being taken out of your  everyday routine.  That is the best medicine for a struggling creative and it's just what I needed. Add in a creative, like-minded friend and some REALLY GOOD food + coffee and call it good times.

Jamaica and I hopped from shop to shop, collecting fodder and ideas and laughs. So good. I'll post more on our trip but wanted to sort of get back in the routine of blogging.

I'm here. Ready to take on the world again. XOT

Meet Max

 

Last week my husband tells me he found us a puppy. Totally out of the blue. My first reaction was not of joy. We only just lost our dog a month ago and I just wasn't ready to have another.

But. We always said that we would know when we found "our dog". It had happened with the last 2 and it was always by chance. My first, mama bear (official name Crystal) was given to me by my brother when he was in high school. I had already moved out but never desired to have a dog. It was pretty much love at first site when I saw her crystal blue eyes, hence the name Crystal. She was a little crazy but protective and fiercely loyal to me. She passed a few months after I was pregnant with Tyler. I'm sad he never got to meet her.

Then our second, Butters (official name Jesse) was the runt of a Catahoula litter. A person was trying to give him away at a garage sale. He definitely looked the part....so scrawny next to his brother who was already set to be adopted. She said no one wanted him. Well that was our sign. He was extremely skittish but a cool dog who only wanted to be loved. He passed last month.

Now our third....Max. Half Husky, half German Shepard. His litter + mom were rescued from owners who couldn't afford to feed them so they were a little starved. He's pretty chill which is nice since Jesse was always so alert and nervous. He reminds me a lot of Crystal....the German Shepard is what attracts me to him since she was half GS.

It took a few days for me to adjust to having another dog in the house other than Jesse or Crystal. He's a cool litle dude though.....his charms are slowly creeping there way into my heart.

hustle.

I decided to change my work routine a couple of weeks ago. I no longer stay up until I can no longer keep my eyelids open. Instead I wake up early to work. So far it seems to be working for me. But I still feel like I need more time. That has been the biggest drawback of not having an office where I can work quietly and efficiently. It's not fair to my son to see his mom tapping away on the her laptop or zipping around the house cutting and printing and packaging. I choose to work only when he is sleeping and when he is on a play date with his cousins. Still, it's just not enough time. This is something I didn't plan for when I left my old job. Am I complaining? No, it's just my reality and somewhat of a good problem.

I often refer to what I do for pay as "hustling". Gotta make that paper booboo although the work I do know doesn't nearly bring home the income I use to make. Don't get it twisted...I'm not rolling in the dough here. So what exactly do I do you ask? Well, I'm photographer for one. I average 2-3 sessions per month which doesn't seem like a lot but when you factor in editing time with the other work I do, it gets overwhelming especially when there's a couple hundred photos to look through in addition to my own personal photography.

I screen print. I design rubber stamps for my personal shop that also houses said screen prints. I scrapbook, still designing for Studio Calico + Paislee Press. I also do other work for Studio Calico including some design and coordinating the digital shop. I started doing product photography for Studio Calico. I do random design jobs locally. Invites, business cards, etc. I'm collaborating with friend on a new shop. Hopefully I'll be able to give some detail on that soon.

I try to blog. I thought I could turn this into a daily type blog full of inspiration and tutorials. Yeah, obvi that's sort of a fail which leads me to this post by Note To Self. ( I stumbled upon this through Pugly Pixel) Great post, especially if you're like me and feel as though you've gotten lost in your blog and the blogging world as a whole. Not going to lie. I get a wee bit jealous when I read various blogs and see how well designed they are and  all the constant updates. That's why I don't actually read blogs that often. I hate that feeling. Plus it takes time away from what I should be doing. On the flip side of the jealousy is the motivation and inspiration. I don't want to  make this to be a negative thing. I often feel rejuvenated when I read a blog I enjoy.

But what about my own blog and brand? It pisses me off that it's still half done and that I still don't have a permanent logo design. Other projects and work have taken precedence over my own personal projects and work. This is where I'm at a loss. I know I'm trying to do too much. My brand is scattered and lacks focus. This is a huge goal for me in the next year. As much as I would like to get this taken care of now, it's just not possible with the looming holidays and birthdays and everything else in between.

Why all this deep personal insight on a Friday morning? Well, it's just what I'm feeling as of late.....actually it's always on my mind. I use to pour my heart out here or actually my old Typepad address. After Tyler was born and Life.Love.Paper become more, things changed. Or is it that blogging world has changed? Is it more about ads and daily updates rather than personal thoughts? Man, it's got to be a fine balance. Kudos to all those successful bloggers out there. It's hard work and I don't think they get enough credit for that. Guess I'll just leave all of that up to them. Sparadic updates on random crap works for me for the time being. :)

Happy Friday. XOT

Hello

It's 6:30 am on Sunday morning. What? Who gets up this early on Sunday? Well my husband for one. He's been working Sundays for several years now which at times sucks but hey, it's life and he's keeping it real. Love that man. So when I heard him getting ready, I thought I would wake up myself to get some things done before the other guy got up who is by the way, POOPED from last night birthday festivities. I sometimes find myself out of place in social settings. Tyler forces me out of my comfort zone so now when we're invited to numerous kid's birthday parties, I of course go. Mainly for him and cake but mostly for him. As he zips through every square inch of my friend's home and makes new friends, I'm left to converse with the other mommies. Oh the exciting things we talk about as moms. We had a thorough discussion on whose kid napped the least that day. Tyler always gets the "omg, how old is he? he's huge!". I really enjoyed myself though, even after a couple of meltdowns. What's nice about being with other moms of young kids is that they get the "meltdown".  I just look at the other moms and we shrug and smile in unison as we try to calm our kids down from whatever has gotten them upset.

Lot's of new things on the horizon. I know I say that a lot, probably prematurely sometimes. But there are really new things going on and if you follow me on Instagram, you got a tiny peek of one of those exciting things. I know, I'm being really cryptic and it's been hard not to reveal the full story but it'll happen in the next week. :)

I'm also working on my last stamp design for the upcoming Life.Love.Paper shop. Not only will there be new stamps but a sort of holiday collection. No, not a kit...just something to enhance whatever project you're planning on doing for the holidays. There will be several screen printed items as well as an exclusive stamp. These are things that inspire me most around the holidays. Snowy trees, twinkle lights. This will also happen in the upcoming week. If you're a newsletter subscriber, you'll be the first to know.

Other exciting news is Liz's big move over to The Lily Pad. She debuted her first collection there last week called Is It Friday Yet? Loved all the digital elements in this kit.

 

Well, I think I need to put a fresh pot of coffee on. I'm going to need it. Happy Sunday! XOT

Continued Construction

Still trying to get things updated around here. Please excuse the mess. :)

On another note, I got some pretty mail last week that I forgot to show. It's a new "paper kit" called Olive Box. I wasn't really sure what to expect but with the introductory price of $15 I thought why not. I subscribe to her Retail Recipes newsletter. Pretty informative and motivating if you're an entrepenuer looking to have your goods in a retail setting. I don't know all the details about the creator but she does own a stationary store in NYC so I knew there would be some pretty paper items included.

The box is beautifully packaged and I was delighted to see items from the Rifle Co. Seeing my name handwritten on a card was a nice touch as well.

 

I personally opted to not subscribe to this paper lovers kit. The cost isn't in my budget at the moment which makes me sad. That said, these would make great gifts. I have a few people in mind who would love to receive a box of pretty stationary and unique finds.

xot

 

Where'd ya go?

My love for blogging. Totally lost. I can't even begin to tell you how much I hate that. I remember when it all started. I would write about the most mundane, random bullshit and I was happy with that. At least I have Instagram. Currents has totally gone, hasn't it? I do still jot it down in my journal and sketchbooks. But I haven't shared in awhile so here we go.

time: 9:05 pm location: couch (or as Kristi would put it, "couchin it") drinking: water eating: nothing but I'm jonesing for a bowl of ice cream watching: Louie (love.this.show.) feeling: apprehensive loving: my arse planted on this couch (I don't think I ever sit while the boy is up. I'm even scrapping and making standing up now. He keeps me on my toes people., it's no joke) thinking: so many things to do and make, so little time making: just completed a special project for a special project wanting: to be somewhere else (I desperately want to get out of the state for awhile but how do you travel with a toddler?!?!) needing: see above

And because it's Friday, gotta throw in some girl loves.

I'm so inspired by this, not only for the pretty typography but the overall message.

That's all. Happy Friday- XOT

20 months later

Being the mom to a busy toddler is extremely different than being a mom of a newborn. Neither is better or worse, just different. There are several books you read in preparation of becoming a mom, mostly on caring for newborns and scheduling and feedings. No one ever prepared me for parenting a toddler and I have to say part of me was not ready. The words I say the most these days are "Tyler" and "no". I feel he is constantly testing the waters aka me + his father to see how far he can get. And why wouldn't he? He doesn't know any better and that's where extreme patience comes in. (and breathing techniques) Sometimes I find that I have to walk away for a moment, especially after a long day of running and picking up after him. This isn't an everyday occurrence. I'm not the mom of a raving lunatic. I know this is just the norm for our life right now.

I started talking with other moms of toddlers. They confided in me about their tot's not so good ways and I did the same. It was such a relief to know what I felt was normal. Tyler is my sunshine. He can turn a frown upside down in a split second. I've learned a lot from him and myself because he is so much like me personality wise. Maybe that's why I get so frustrated...I'm dealing with a miniature Tina.

There are times I crave solidarity, peace and quiet. Oh do I love a clean quiet house. I never knew how much I loved those 2 things until I had a kid. If I can steal an hour to myself out of the day which is usually nap time, I'm happy. Even happier when the boy wakes up feeling refreshed and ready to give me a work out and a million laughs.

xot

(Everday I love you more and more digital element is from Paislee Press's newest release, Meant To Be)

Spotted

It's been fun spotting my prints and stamps all over Instagram + blogs. I love seeing them go out the door to new homes but seeing them put into action makes what I do that much more awesome. Amy Tan's CHA 2012 booth-

Seriously, having my print in Amy Tan's booth was so cool. I was like a proud parent. :) Only wish I could have seen it in person. (this photo is from Amy's Instagram)

Vee's Project Life

Vee continues to amaze me with her project life. I can see her personality all contained in little plastic pockets. I had commented on her blog that I envied her ability to not only keep up PL but to do it in the most artful way. I love how she incorporated the mini prints into her current week. I'm so honored to be a part of her documentation of life.

Thank you all for you amazing support. I've got a lot of new things on the horizon and I cannot wait to show you.

Have a wonderful weekend. xot

Silver Salmon Fishing

Dad and I set out on a little fishing adventure this week. We took the boat down to Deshka River which is about a 2 hour drive from Anchorage. The day started out on the gloomy/rainy side but the sun peeked out and made for a great day of fishing. I had a great time on the river. It was so peaceful. The repetitive motion of casting and reeling is quite a calming effect on the mind. Then you get a bite and the fun part begins. It was a trip to actually see all the salmon swimming up stream. All in all, it was a great trip having caught 1 Silver and 2 Pinks which we threw back. Apparently Pinks aren't a great fish to eat so those guys were lucky. The Silver, not so much. Dad caught 3 himself but they came home with me. :) Guess what we'll be having for dinner tonight?

xot